Trying to focus on my faith!

This morning and the last few days I have been struggling...  Struggling with sadness, worry, stress and just everything that Satan is trying to throw at me to discourage my faith!  I have been having a few health issues since I took my missions trip in May to Haiti.  I came back and got sick, I wasn't sick while I was over there, but the next day after I landed back in the states it all kicked in.  It started out with depression.  I will say that I had complete culture shock when I returned, but I can say that God has blessed me with being able to get passed that and just see things for how they are.  When I came back I also was physically sick as well.  Without saying TMI, I will just say that right now my doctor has narrowed it down to a few possibilities of what might be wrong with me.  So the options are........  1.  Problem with my gallbladder  2.  Intestinal Yeast Infection  3.  I have gotten a parasite while over in Haiti.

Well I am pretty sure the gallbladder is fine (no pain in my sternum when I eat) so I am between 2 and 3.  Well, let me say this it would be odd that right after I return from Haiti that I would have the yeast flare up out of nowhere.  Yeah I was on anti-biotics before I left, which can kill the good bacteria with the bad bacteria causing an intestinal yeast infection), but wouldn't you think I would had a sign of that while in Haiti for 2 weeks!??!  So I am feeling that we are down to a parasite.

It is scary to think that I could of gotten a parasite while in Haiti, especially to think about moving there and well who knows if I will catch it again.  But honestly that doesn't scare me about Haiti at all.  I know most people would of freaked out and said no forget it about the move and everything else, but I know that no matter what if I am healthy or sick or rich or poor as long as I follow God's will for my life I will pull through.  As long as I keep fighting for Him everything will be okay.  So I return to my doctors on Friday to find out more information so hopefully its all good news!  If I had a parasite that well I am healed and its gone, and if it wasn't a parasite what it is and whats our next step on the healing process!!!!!!

So what else does Satan have me worrying about...... well Haiti is a month away!!!!!! I am not quite sure how I am going to fund this trip and I am not quite sure how my car will get sold, but hey I started off in the beginning of this journey saying that I am not worried about it, that if this is God's will for my life everything will work out how its supposed to (how he wants it to) and that I have no reason to worry about it.  Well of course Satan has been trying to sneak in and get me to worry about the things that I have no control over and shouldn't stress out about.  I will remind myself that no matter what happens that its all in God's hands.  I do have a feeling though that this is a lesson for me from God though.   A lesson about patience and trust!!!!!!!!  I am realizing that I am starting to get impatient to hear answers, which is then leading to a lack of trust and trying to figure out plan b of how to make everything work.  I shouldn't need to come up with plan B, I only need to stick to Plan A and that plan is to TRUST GOD and to HAVE FAITH that he will do everything in my life for his glory.  :)  So I am saying now I am going to stop worrying about things, I am going to stop trying to figure out how I am going to fund this or sell my car or what is going to happen I am just going to trust!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!